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A Simple Tool to Reconnect to Your Drive

What gets you going in the morning? Why do you wake up and do the things you do? Why do you want the things you want?

Have you ever stopped for a minute and asked yourself: "What is the driving force in my life?"

In each one of us, lies a desire to be fulfilled, expressed, and organically driven. We long for this enthusiasm and excitement that gets us out of bed each morning.

But where does the drive for these ways of being come from?

How can we reconnect to this internal driving force when we feel tired and burned out or when our dreams feel too big and we find ourselves slipping back into old habits just going with the motions... doing just enough to keep our head above the surface.

What if there was a simple tool that could keep you not just head barely above the surface for air, but your entire body, mind & soul fully expressed out into the world?

1. Your why

To bring more spark to your yearnings and the projects you're trying to bring into this world, it is important to become clear with your WHY.

Your why is comprised of the main reasons you're going after a goal and the emotional reasons that will keep you going when obstacles arise. It is the force behind what you do.

It is the difference between nice-to-have and must-be.

It is the difference between a false sense of wanting something to "keep up with the Joneses" and a desire authentically aligned with who you are in the depth of your being.

Over the years, I've come to realize there are actually 2 types of whys. I call them your Soulful Why and your Selfish Why.

2. Your Soulful Why

Your Soulful why is that deep yearning, the longing you feel you were born with, you just can't help it or explain it. When it comes to purpose, it answers the following question:

If you had all your expenses covered, would you still be doing the work you do? And if so, why?

If your family and your home were taken care of, would you still aspire to the same dreams? And if so, WHY?

Take a moment to ponder on this.

3. Your Selfish Why

Your Selfish why is a different type of reason. Think of it as the reason that satisfies the ego part of yourself. In order to feel complete and authentic, it's okay to give a voice to your ego!

We actually want to bring it to the table and own it.

Deep down what is the reason your ego is being driven to a particular outcome?

There's a chance that if you were to tell everyone about your Selfish why, you would initially feel a tad bit uncomfortable.

No need to tell everyone but keep this why in your awareness and own it.


Take a moment to journal about all the reasons that drive you to what you are longing for. Distinguish your true authentic whys (both soulful why and selfish why) from family and society-influenced drives.

Think of your why as a gateway to reconnect with your true drive.


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Stephanie Labay helps women at a crossroads who are feeling stuck, and ready for a change, create a more fulfilling & meaningful work life, have an impact, and feel energized instead of stressed and exhausted.

With a Master's in Engineering, close to a decade in the corporate world, and another decade teaching wellness & mindfulness practices, she combines neuroscience, performance optimization, EFT, and mindfulness in a unique blend to help women redefine what is possible and transition toward their vision with clarity, ease, and confidence.

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